We are ResilientPractical Skills for Lifelong Wellness

Skills to help us Center, Connect, and Collaborate

Why We Are Resilient™

We have learned that the best way to help children is to ensure that the adults who serve them have strong Social and Emotional Learning (SEL) and resilience skills. With stronger resilience skills, these adults – especially parents, educators and pediatric providers – will be able to strengthen their caring relationships with children to both buffer them from life stresses and pass on the skills through modeling.

We also know that adults need resilient training for themselves and their work. Those in the helping professions, such as teachers and health care workers, absorb trauma every day. Organizations are looking for solutions to help with this trauma, to help retain staff and do their work from a centered, strength-based position. Our solutions are available as an Open Education Resource (OER), so they can be customized to different situations and are free, shareable, and available to all who need them. We Are Resilient™ has been designed to meet these needs.

The novel coronavirus, COVID19, is causing tremendous stress for our health and education systems, for professionals now working at home, and for families around the world who may be in quarantine. Now, more than ever, people are looking for ways to help with stress and trauma.

We Are Resilient™ provides simple and practical skills for people to be their best selves. Even though we don’t have control over many aspects of our lives, we can tap into our inner capacity for resilience to help us be strong in the face of uncertainty.

We are Resilient™ offers simple, effective, and research-based
skills that help children and adults cope with stress.
Download 2-page overview of We Are Resilient™.

STEP 1: Starts with Noticing our Protective Patterns

Protective Patterns:

  • Protect us from harm
  • Help us survive
  • Normal in stress, trauma
  • Can limit us
  • Need to assess each situation: Is my reaction helping or making it worse?

Download a free introductory handout to learn more about Protective Patterns.

STEP 2: Skills for Centering Myself


  • Calms us
  • Restores inner balance
  • Relieves stress and anxiety
  • Reduces negative thoughts
  • Focuses on the present
  • Helps us achieve personal goals

Download a free introductory handout to learn more about how to use Centering Skills.

Centering Myself

STEP 3: Skills for Connecting with others


  • Creates safety, trust, and belonging
  • Builds empathy and understanding
  • Opens our heart to kindness
  • Reduces blame, judgment, and bias
  • Encourages equity
  • Helps us feel seen, heard, and valued

Download a free introductory handout to learn more about how to use Connecting Skills.

Connecting Skills

STEP 4: Skills for Collaborating Together


  • Fosters a shared purpose
  • Supports co-creation for a common good
  • Encourages healthy boundaries
  • Honors the contributions of all
  • Creates shared accountability
  • Promotes integrity

Coming soon! Download a free introductory handout to learn more about how to use Collaborating Skills.

Collaborating Skills

NOTE: We Are Resilient™ is an Open Education Resource, free and adaptable to any context with attribution. Please share with friends and colleagues who might benefit! We Are Resilient™ is designed as a collective work in progress, and we appreciate your feedback.

Also, if you adapt the work for your context, we would love to see your iterations! Please share back your revisions by emailing us info@dovetaillearning.org or posting on our Facebook Page or Twitter Feed so we can share your genius with others who might want it.

Coming in May! Box of Cards that outlines the research and science that supports each skill.

The Story of We Are Resilient™

We are Resilient

The challenges of this past year (including our fire evacuation) have helped us sharpen our focus on what the world needs most: practical emotional and social resilience skills to create a world that works for everyone.  For our team, resilience is a recurring theme in our personal lives, for our organization, in the people we encounter, and in the world around us.  Recognizing this profound need has intensified our passion and commitment to the success of our work. Our new mission reflects this:  

To help adults and children become their best selves through fostering resilience internally, in their relationships, and within their communities.

We Are Resilient™ has emerged from our research and our decades of experience supporting families, educators, and pediatric professionals. It also was informed by our own experiences of adversities. Members of our team have experienced these traumas (many of them when we were children): 

  • Parental Divorce
  • Financial Insecurity
  • Aunt with Bipolar Disorder
  • Grandmother with Schizophrenia
  • Grandfather who died by Suicide
  • Parental Depression
  • Alcoholic Father
  • Parental abuse of medication
  • Sexual Abuse
  • Emotionally abused by caregiver
  • Parent with anxiety disorder
  • Physical abuse by parent
  • Spousal abuse
  • Incarceration of a sibling
  • Threat of physical violence
  • Substance abuse by parent
  • Father who had his first heart attack before 40

We know first hand that we sometimes need to rely on emotional protective patterns to protect ourselves AND that our lives are richer when we strengthen our resilience skills.  We also know that this work is part of a lifelong journey–the miracle of being human!