Have you ever found yourself reacting in a way at work that surprised you? That happened to me recently during a team meeting—a moment that turned into an opportunity for growth.
We were working on Zoom on a project together when a simple suggestion to tweak a spreadsheet set me off. I felt overlooked, undervalued, and like I didn’t have a say in how things got done. It instantly brought me back to times in my career when I had little control—a reminder that even when roles with more responsibility, old patterns can still pop up.
Here’s the thing: even teams like ours, who teach resilience, get messy sometimes.
Thankfully, my incredible teammates helped me pause and reflect. I shared what I was noticing in real time, and they gave me the space and grace to work through it. Their support reminded me of something so important: resilient teams are about showing up—honestly—especially when things feel out of control.
When my team gave me the chance to explore why I was reacting, I was able to stop the spiral of shame and judgment that often follows. For me, one of my go-to Protective Patterns is Attacking. When I feel devalued or unheard, I get BIG—a survival skill I developed as a kid to make enough noise to be seen. But being able to pause, reflect, and share openly with my team meant I could recognize my reaction and repair it in real time.
At Dovetail, we’ve seen firsthand how embracing vulnerability and authenticity helps us connect and grow. I’m grateful to work with people who aim high by truly caring about one another. Creating spaces where everyone can show up as their true selves—without judgment—creates a ripple effect far beyond the workplace.
Whether it’s at your job, on a recreational sports team, or in a book club, when people are allowed to be exactly who they are, it leads to deeper learning, genuine growth, and a more fulfilling connection.
So, how can you create spaces in your own life—at work, at home, or in your community—where authenticity is welcomed, and resilience can grow through life’s messy moments?
Kristie and the Dovetail Team
P.S. As I continue learning and growing, I find myself collecting so many powerful insights and reflections. I’ll be sharing more of them in our We Are Resilient™community as a way to deepen engagement and spark meaningful conversations.
Check out the skills Kristie is using:
- The Connecting Skills of Empathizing and Choosing Kindness
- The Collaborating Skill of Contributing Intentionally