I was recently facilitating a standing group meeting that has some regular no-shows. It’s annoying and frustrating. I’m amazed by how often some people don’t communicate whether they will attend a meeting or not. It is a kindness to communicate and often an implied agreement to let each other know if we won’t be there, or if we will be late. This communication is fundamental to Honoring Agreements.
There is a BIG cost to not communicating. It matters because it breaks down trust and it takes emotional capital to wonder if someone will be there or not. If it’s a regular pattern, it can be downright exasperating.
Honoring Agreements is about Integrity.
Integrity is a matter of a person’s word —
nothing more and nothing less.
~ Michael Jensen, Harvard Business School
Jenson says we can honor our word in one of two ways:
- By keeping our word, and on time;
- Or, as soon as we know that we won’t keep our word, we inform all parties counting on us to keep our word and clean up any mess that we’ve caused in their lives.
WOW, this is what I experience in people who I respect the most. Integrity!
Most of us miss on keeping our word about something. There is absolutely no shame in missing something we said we would do– as long as we communicate it. If my friends in my standing meeting just took the time to communicate when they wouldn’t be coming, our collaboration would be that much smoother. Of course, all of us miss that step sometimes. Yesterday, I didn’t tell my wife I wouldn’t be able to get the recycling out on time. Oh, gosh, if I’d just remembered to communicate it! 🙃
Our relational resilience is stronger with integrity and a commitment to Honoring Agreements!