One of my favorite moments in our training comes while exploring the power of appreciation.
Last Saturday, near the end of our session, I invited participants to do something unexpected: take out their phones—yes, right in the middle of the training—and send a quick text of appreciation to someone in their lives. Over 100 people looked down at their screens and began typing heartfelt messages. As they hit send, smiles spread across the room. When they looked up, something had shifted. Not only had they connected more deeply with the person they texted—but also with each other. The energy in the room softened. Together, we tapped into something real powerful.
It got me thinking: Why do we fail to communicate what we appreciate?
Sometimes we just get caught up in our lives, in our “to-do list.” We forget that a “simple thank you for doing that” can be a significant investment in our relationships.
Once, when working on a complex project with several collaborators, I spent hours working on my section, only to be told it had to be done a different way. Though I had to respect the other person’s authority, it felt like my effort was wasted. Fortunately, another collaborator jumped in to say they appreciated my vision and work, even though it might not be in the final product. That tiny gesture shifted everything for me. It reminded me that appreciation doesn’t have to be grand—it just has to be authentic and timely.
Many of us are in personal and professional environments where appreciation is rarely given. I have felt that way in the past, in other jobs, or as a mom of young children. Years ago, I ran a program for 500 children and adults and depended on dozens of volunteers. It taught me that appreciation isn’t just nice—it’s essential. (Most managers could benefit from that experience, as too many cling to the outdated belief that providing a paycheck is enough to motivate others.) Thankfully, Chuck ingrained appreciation in Dovetail’s culture, which also gave me a deeper understanding of the power of the skill.
Sometimes, giving appreciation can make one feel vulnerable. We are admitting we can’t do it all, and need others. Other times, the excuse is “if it is rare, it is more valued.” These beliefs, which are often passed down in Cultural Patterns, miss the power of appreciation, which can be the WD-40 of relationships. It eases the relationships and dissipates problems more quickly. Appreciation helps others feel seen, heard, and valued—strengthening our Relational Resilience. Especially in virtual or hybrid environments, like ours, appreciation strengthens connection and trust. “Thanks for your help on that project,” might seem small—but it can make a lasting impact.
In the training last Saturday, when I asked how it went, several people said their recipient sent a nice message back, and it made them feel so good—such a valuable reminder to all of us to boost our appreciation.
Who could you reach out to today to say thank you?
With appreciation for YOU and all that you do!
Thanks for reading!
Meri and the Dovetail Learning team